This! ☝🏾☝🏾☝🏾

Men need to understand that the issues of trust that most of them are having with women, in public spaces, were caused by other men. Other, asshole men, messed that up for them, and they are the ones who should be blamed for women being on their guard against all men, just in case they get hurt.

And then there’s the double standard of being blamed for the issue no matter what you do. If a woman doesn’t respond, then SHE is the one being rude. If she’s friendly, and something bad happens, then she should have known better!

I tell all my girlfriends, they are not obligated to give their time, phone, numbers, or even a smile, to strange men, just because it’s what they want.

I also want to address a fundamental erasure in men’s understanding of catcalling. Not all catcalling is men lobbing compliments about a woman’s loveliness. A lot of the catcalling consists of the kinds of shoutouts made by Miggs (Hannibal Lecter’s cellmate) from Silence of the Lambs. Catcalling doesn’t just consist of “compliments”.