I only said that because there are some other reasons women might respond the way she did and it doesn't mean she never experience sexual trauma from a man. She very well could have been through something but the result of that trauma was blaming herself and her "lack of control". She tells herself that whatever it was wouldn't have happened if she'd been in better control of the situation. Just asking her the question might have triggered her.

And then there are women who haven't been through it who think all that is required is reasoning with the attacker, and engaging in all the proper behaviors to avoid such trauma, like not drinking, or going out alone at night, or being nice to strangers. Women who think there's some magical solution to avoiding sexual trauma when the decision to never experience it was never under their control, in the first place.

I have not experienced the level of trauma discussed in this piece ,but I do recognize that it was simply pure luck. I just never encountered the man, either as a child or an adult, who decided he wanted to harm me.