As an aside, I thought you explicitly stated you wanted to hear from women. I know the guys in your comments mena well, and some of them are trying to be funny (they are failing) but I thought I would give an actual thoughtful response rather than jokes that belittle how sexuality works in the 21st century. I know its confusing to "codgers" but one of the ways a person remains relevant in a discussion is to keep an open mind and learn new things.

Playing hard to get became date rape when women started asserting that we would no longer say no when what we actually meant was yes, and people stopped slut-shaming us for actually letting our partner know we liked and wanted sex. It became date rape when a guy could get enthusiastic consent without shame on the girl's part.

When women stopped "pretending" they didn't like sex (as they had been taught all their lives), the rules became men must then get enthusiastic consent from their partner. So when yes actually and enthusiastically meant YES, then no began to actually really mean NO, and when she said no you stopped doing whatever you were doing.